According to Moonalice legend, Oxford, Maine was home to the English university of same name. Unfortunately, we weren't paying attention when the English repossessed the place, so it's not here any more.

According to Moonalice legend, Oxford is home to the Nateva Center for Lobster Arts & Sciences. The center was the brainchild of Nateva Moonalice, a matriarch who dreamed of a utopian society based entirely on lobsters. Today's poster shows Nateva riding her Lobster-mobile. For those of you who are wondering what happened to Nateva's lobster-powered utopia, we'll give you a hint. When she died, Nateva weighed about 400 pounds.

According to Moonalice legend, the Fourth of July is the 185th day of the year. It's also a holiday with really good fireworks. And it's the anniversary of the day when both Thomas Jefferson and John Adams died.

National anthem played by Chris Elliott on trumpet.